Donna ‘Black-Cat’ Bugat: Pisque tu pars…(The Garden of No Distant Place & Love 10.09.2019)
I spent the day at my beautiful little sister’s memorial in the Garden of No Distant Place.
... the longest journey...
My world fell apart nineteen years ago, when she suddenly left this world, too soon.
I really have tried but I will never be able to “come to terms” with her loss, so I have just learnt to do the best I can, through the tears.
I love life and have two truly beautiful sons.
My little sister is an angel who will always be missing.
Her memorial is comforting to me, because you are welcome to peacefully honour and celebrate your loved one’s life, whenever you want or need to, with dignity, and the people who work there keep everything so beautiful.
My little sister Jenni would love her own memorial because it is a gentle carbon neutral footprint in what is another nature lovers paradise full of natural and human beauty.
It is the first time I have felt any small comfort over her death.
... the spring room...
A gentleman came and slowly turned the page for me, to the page remembering my little sister, in the glass house, which houses the books from the spring season, which is when she died.
Then he discreetly left so I could sit there quietly and take my time.
... the book...
The Garden of No Distant Place has four small connected glass buildings, situated among tranquil gardens, with each room representing a season.
There are so many tears.
... miss u xxx...
The phone call when my precious little sister died.
The primal grief.
The longest journey of my life, during a fuel strike and an Olympics.
I still wept at her memorial now because I still miss her so much, but the place is also a place of healing too, in quiet and respectful surroundings, with so many tributes from so many people to their loved ones.
The Garden of No Distant Place is a place of Love.
There is so much love there.
... I signed Donna because that is the name I was given when I was born...
While I was quietly strolling around the gardens I came across a beautiful rosella which reminded me of my home in France in my own nature lovers paradise which has so many birds and birdsong. I was pleased my sister's Garden of No Distant Place has beautiful birds and birdsong too.
I think all music should be in French and that French birdsong is the most beautiful. Each culture is special but related to another. The French are cousins of Italians in many ways.
I lost my beautiful little sister twice.
Puisque tu pars…
The British and Australian governments would never be able to explain why two sisters were raised separately.
There have been endless borders and barriers dividing the Bugat family, over and over again, all through all the centuries, regardless of our nationality or religion.
... the darkness...
I was born in Australia, during the Franco era when no-one liberated Catalans.
Little Italy. Lyon Street, Carlton.
The governments only ever intended to cause me permanent harm, by robbing me of everything about my true identity. Keeping me from those who loved me.
It was convenient for the intelligence services to take a Catalan Italian child they didn’t want challenging their colonial Treaty of Utrecht and instead raise that child with a different identity, to try and make me a ‘universal soldier’ for them.
What they did was unconscionable.
They got a universal peacenik instead.
I was seriously traumatised by a number of horrific incidents when I was small child, which contributed to post-traumatic stress disorder.
I had just wanted to go home to my own family.
I refused to work for people who had changed and refused to give me back my true identity, which did and has caused so much pain, including beyond me too.
The world of the intelligence services was not and has never been my world and they had no right to take away all my rights when I was a child, to try and involve me in and use me in their world.
... my little sister's garden of no distant place has rosellas...
I am one of the children the governments belatedly wishfully labelled “forgotten’ in 2012, when of course I was not at all “forgotten” because I was in Parliament Square, Central London.
Brian and myself did very publicly force the repeal of their legislated free speech ban in the UK.
My sister. My angel would have thoroughly approved of what we did.
She would have been there with us through it all, if she had been alive.
I have been to paradise but I have never been to me and all that.
The legislation in Australia (that no-one told me about) regarding the “forgotten” children is seriously defective too, because no-one should be subjected to the distress of a harrowing court ordeal, to have their true identity back, while the government avoid cross examination, including before a civil jury.
The British and Australian governments didn’t admit until 2011 that the people who posed as my parents (and godparents) worked for the highest echelons of the British and Australian intelligence services.
I guess the intelligence services were used when I was a child, so that I would never have access to proper legal representation, which remained true even when I was an adult, in the UK when Brian and myself had multiple High Court civil jury lawsuits over the free speech ban.
There was no legal representation when politicians horse-traded among themselves to cover up the 8 March 2007 emails from a High Court civil jury in the UK because the emails proved improper political interference in due process.
The continuing failure of legal representation and due process led to the life threatening violent attack by an undercover agent on me on 17 August 2007, which because it was also covered up led to the life threatening torture used on me by the government on 4 September 2009, simply because the government just refused to comply with any and all basic disclosures.
The 8 March 2007 emails and the CCTV from 4 September 2009 say it all really.
The government had first tried to exile me from the UK in 2008 and always intended to at best exile Brian and myself, because they did not want us having medical treatment or access to any benefits in the UK because we were clearly entitled to High Court civil jury lawsuits the government knew they had already lost.
Brian died in Bremen in Germany because of so many failures in access to proper medical treatment and due process.
I have already suffered permanent damage with the multiple illnesses now affecting me, because I was exiled from the UK and did not have access to proper medical treatment in France. Now I need intensive specialist medical treatment to try and limit the progression and worsening of multiple connected illnesses including auto-immune diseases.
The medical system does not currently meet my needs because there is not supposed to be a delay between diagnosis and specialist treatment with my medical conditions because the medical aim is to stop the progression and worsening of serious inflammations etc that have already caused irreparable harm and damage.
The true situation is I am suffering is because I have never had the most basic rights of even any access to justice with a civil jury to redress any of the many wrongs that separated two sisters.
The separation of two sisters has caused not just serious emotional harm but quite literally, very real physical harm.
I am the oldest daughter of my mother and father and apart from my little sister who died, my other siblings have different mothers and fathers.
The government could never explain why two sisters were raised separately and why I have never had the opportunity to make my own choice and informed decisions to reclaim my true identity etc.
I had arrived in Australia on 10 September 1996 to meet my little sister, on my way to the UK from New Zealand, and four years later on 10 September 2000 while I was living in the UK, she died in Australia, shortly before she planned to join me in the UK.
The current PM and Leader of the Opposition in the UK who both originally horse-traded over the 8 March 2007 emails have now managed to pro-rogue (well no-one is arguing they are rogues) the British Parliament in the UK over a referendum.
I guess the reality is democracy was ‘prorogued’ long ago, including when the British betrayed the Catalans with the Treaty of Utrecht which is why many Catalans want to be independent whatever that means.
The EU really should have a justiciable EU Constitution so that people know what they are joining or staying within.
The fact a referendum could actually have consequences for many families across the British Commonwealth and EU, outside the UK, hasn’t been addressed by any politicians anywhere.
The Jewish State is and became independent because people were legally entitled to use self defence to claim a safe space, because there wasn’t any government anywhere who tried to protect Jewish people from the Holocaust, despite knowing Jewish people had been persecuted and expelled over so many centuries, including from Spain.
My beautiful little sister was Catholic.
The Bugat family who have lived in the mountains and valleys on all ‘sides’ of always changing ‘border’ regions all around the Mediterranean and through Eastern Europe to the Central Asian steppes, have been Jewish, Catholic and Muslim.
The intelligence services should have told me the truth about my true identity when I was travelling in Israel and Italy in the real 1984, so my little sister and myself could have made our own informed decisions.
I do not believe I need anyone’s permission to choose my own religion, which I have never had the freedom or opportunity to do or practice.
It is strange but true that I have lived the life of a true converso in this modern world, in our times.
I saw in the Garden of No Distant Place that we are all human so we can’t always solve all the worlds problems, but it is possible for there to be more love for each other and everyone in the world.